1. |
Disconnect
04:19
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Suffocate me
Then render each limb
More useless than the last
It's the only way
I’ll ever find happiness
This loneliness won’t kill me
But these walls are closing in
And I feel more and more
Like I’ve got nowhere to go
When I closed my eyes
I saw the terrors in my heart become personified
And when I wake up
I see them resonate in myself
And I’m terrified
My calloused hands
Are hanging on to the same dreams
The same sunken hopes
I let myself decay
When all the world was at my feet
Now my bones just burden me
And I am losing faith
I let myself decay
(I find myself at the bottom)
Now my bones just burden me
Why can’t I ever be happy?
Why can’t I ever be at peace?
Why does my world revolve around
The thing that’s killing me?
I’m not okay
Suffocate me
Body immobilized
I know when
I hold my head up
I get knocked down
And dragged in
Down in the dirt
I fucking realized
That my eyes won’t adjust
In the absence of life
This loneliness won’t kill me
But these walls are closing in
And I feel more and more
Like I’ve got nowhere to go
And I’m trapped inside this disconnect
Alone and hollow within
Like I’ve got nowhere to go
Sometimes I wish my heart would stop
But I know that wouldn’t be enough
I’ll take my place
Among the lowlives
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2. |
Blasphemer
03:35
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You take all that you can from us
And ask for our love in return
These snakes are your allies
They conjure the demons
That you create in your mind
Suppress the thoughts that you cannot help but have, they tell you
It’s not your life to live
Folded arms over human atrocity
But you’re the one who’s the monstrosity, shit
I never asked for this
I never asked to be judged
Day after day
Living just to die
I am a liar inside
I am nothing but dirt in your eyes
Disconnected from the very place
That taught me what I know
If I look back I feel the scorn of my ‘brothers’
I feel the hate in their words
Poison has infected their minds
And all they ever do is fucking stare at the sky
Open your eyes
They have fallen victim
They have fallen victim
To the pseudo regime
All the words you’ve said
And the space in between
They have fallen victim
I’m only here to live my life
I need to live before I fucking die
Fire
“Burns my heart”
I am just
A mortal man
I’m not your son of god
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3. |
Lapse
03:52
|
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Now all I see
Are the walls in front of me
I can’t break them on my own
No one knows who I am
Or what’s become of me
I can see everything
Every ounce of my being
Is filled with these reasons
Why I shouldn’t be here
If I put them together
Like puzzle pieces
I will find my answer
Deep within my iniquities
Within my regrets and
That’s where I make my peace with this world
I am lost I must be dead
I am lost in my own head
All the same empty nights
Only filled with the chaos inside
All the same empty nights
Only filled with the chaos inside
I’ve just been strangling myself with the ropes from the bridges I’ve tried burning
Release me
From this persecution
I can only breathe
When you’re not with me
Release me
From this persecution
I can only breathe
When you’re not with me
I’ve become acquainted with the feeling of absence
Because my mind is detached from my body
And my heart is no longer connected to anything
It only feels the embrace of my own misery
But I’d be damned if I don’t try to look inside my eyes when I see my reflection in the mirror
Tell myself that though things may be blurry
Someday I’ll see them clearer
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4. |
Pyre
03:28
|
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You’re already disconnected
From your life
From yourself
I know you’ve missed this
I’ll burn our memories
Because I know you won’t be coming back
You won’t come back
(I’m broken)
I watch the wind carry you away
But there’s nothing I can do
In the blaze I felt your presence fade
Until I was left choking on the smoke
Each day blurs into the next
And I can't help
But feel this weight upon my chest
Pushing me back down
Further from happiness
I don’t know what I’ll do without you here
I watch the wind carry you away
But there’s nothing I can do
In the blaze I felt your presence fade
Until I was left choking on the smoke
I’ve let you go
I’ve let you burn
I’ve let you go
I’ve let you burn
I can’t hold you anymore
I’m the only one to blame
I watch the wind carry you away
But there’s nothing I can do
In the blaze I felt your presence fade
Until I was left choking on the smoke
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5. |
Distill
04:49
|
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I’ve been beaten
Left for dead
I’ve seen the void I tried to leave behind me
I’ve welcomed animosity
And I’m tired of the consequences
And the only thing
I want
Is to live my life
And not feel like
I’ve ripped apart my scars
Now death doesn’t seem so far
I wish I could feel anything
But this fucking apathy
I find it hard to breathe
Knowing I have to live another day
These years that feel like centuries
Like centuries wasting away
My brokenness that wraps around my head
As I fall asleep, and try to untangle each and every thread
But I know that no amount of rest
Will make it go away
Please make it go away
Will you watch me drown?
Please don’t let me drown
I wish that I could fall asleep
But this sickness haunts my dreams
And I am pulling at my skin
Trying to get out again
I’ve been beaten
Left for dead
I’m fucking tired of being misled
By my own thoughts
Swimming around inside my head
And the only thing
I want
Is to take a breath and not feel like
I’m only here to die
Am I just here to die?
I wish I could feel anything
But this fucking apathy
I find it hard to breathe
Knowing I have to live another day
These years that feel like centuries
Like centuries wasting away
I’ve never
Been good enough
For anyone
As I fall asleep
I know I can only dream
Of what it’s like
To be something more than this
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